Wednesday, February 20, 2008

concentrate on who is important

I have a very active imagination. I prefer books to movies because what I picture in my head is much more realistic that what movie format is limited to.

This is not a benefit when you wake up in the middle of the night to some discomfort and feel a lump.

Until you can get to a DR, imagination is not your friend. In fact, imagination races about a littl faster than the speed of thought.

It was a long 36 hours.

During that long 36 hours, it took intense concentration to visualize erasing my mind and replacing all thoughts with the image of Kat. Or Wife and Kat. Imagine. Erase. Kat smiling at me. Imagine scenarios. Erase (mentally wipe a board clean so it is white) Picture Wife smiling at me, holding Kat. Kat giggling when you tickle her tummy. Imagine what if. Erase. Kat laying on my chest, smiling, grabbing my nose.

This has been a difficult week. I am trying to figure out what I want to do differently. I want to be meaningful, appreciated for my efforts. I have stuff to get done so I can clear time to raise my family. When HP sends you a little message to get your attention, pay attention to the message. HP leaves it up to you to act. We are in control of our destiny.

And the doc said it could be a couple of things. It might have lasting effect. We will watch it for awhile. Hoping for the best, but even the worst isn't life threatening. In that context, it is no big deal.

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