Monday, October 27, 2008


and my stupid computer/internet connection lost my post I just typed in.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

cutest little girl!

It was pointed out to me that I have been woefully remiss in posting pictures of my cute little girl.
Let me correct that oversight immediately.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Ick. I got memed

A poo flinging monkey tagged me with a picture meme. Go see the procrastinating perfectionist that tagged me and fling poo at her.
As I understand it, I am supposed to dig into my sixth picture file and pick the sixth picture and explain it.
Then I am supposed to tag six others to do the same. I am not sure I know six bloggers that I can tag with a picture meme, but I can certainly explain the picture below.
Wife and I went to the Bellagio while we were in vegas for the brunch. Which was ok. Not great but certainly ok.
Anyway, afterwards, we wandered around the splendor that makes up the B and found that they have a aboratorium (sp?). While we walked around the plants and saw 499 different versions of MUMS (seriously? MUMS!) I took a picture of a couple in front of a tree with their camera. They wanted to return the favor so they took a picture of Wife and I. Now keep in mind that we had walked from the MGM to the B (90 degrees) and just finished gorging ourselves on the buffet. I WAS going to get my $59 worth of food out of the place. And we were tired and needed a nap. But we stood together and looked ordinary and had our picture taken together by some stranger from Japan. A good thing, really. We need to have momentos of our vacation together.

Friday, October 10, 2008

How the stock market works

Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the
villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each.
The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to
the forest, and started catching them. The man bought thousands at $10
and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He
further announced that he would now buy at $20. This renewed the efforts of
the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.
Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back
to their farms. The offer increased to $25 each and the supply of monkeys
became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey, let alone catch
The man now announced t hat he would buy monkeys at $50 ! However,
since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now
buy on behalf of him.
In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers. "Look at
all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell
them to you at $35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell them
to him for $50 each."
The villagers rounded up with all their savings and bought all the
monkeys. Then they never saw the man nor his assistant again, only monkeys
Now you have a better understanding of how the stock market works.

I know who I am in this story (see gambling post below), How about YOU?

Thursday, October 2, 2008

15 months

I took Kat for 15 month checkup today. In addition to being 98% for height and 50% for weight, she got three shots. My first experience having to hold her down so the nurses could jab her repeatedly. Kat started fussing when the nurse opened up the band aids and stuck then on the table. Kat started wiggling and flailing her arms around. Then when I scooped her up and laid her out on the table, she started whimpering. Then the wicked nurse struck.
Kat looked right into my eyes and screamed. Then cried. Cried so hard her whole head turned red.
All in all, I think I handled it pretty well.
I didn't cry at all.

update - while I was typing this out, Kat stood up under the table and banged her head. She then fell down. Then stood up and banged her head. I shouldn't laugh. I did the same thing until I was in my mid thirties.

What to do in Vegas

People keep telling me you can’t go to Vegas and NOT gamble.
I admit it. I gambled. In fact, every single time I have gone to LVegas I have gambled on something. Usually $20 on slots. If you pick a nickel machine, that $20 can give you hours of entertainment. That’s me, living on the edge.
This time I tried roulette.
Why roulette? While I was in school we had a prof that talked about the best single event odds that you can get in a casino is to play ONCE for either red or black at a roulette wheel. If you only play it once, you have a 49% chance of winning. About a month after that lecture, my buddy Poker Player and I were out for an after work motorcycle ride and since we couldn’t come up with a better idea we went to Riverside Casino in Riverside, Iowa. It was a decent distance away and made for a nice ride after work. When we got there, Poker Player wanted to gamble. I didn’t really want to but I told him about what the prof had said. Keep in mind, Poker Player really enjoys pitting his skill against other people. He has an incredible memory and is very smart and as a result he does pretty well playing poker in tournaments. In his mind, he isn’t playing a game of chance but a game of skill. So I was very surprised when he listened to my roulette story and said, “sure, I’ll try that once” He went over to the table and dropped a $20 on Red. And won. Then he double dog dared me to do the same. Well, I am not a chicken (although Loren called me a girl!) so I dropped $20 on black. And won. Winnings in hand, we left.

So while I was wandering around watching people and while Wife was studying (sleeping) in the room, I decided to play roulette a little bit. I sat down at a table and watched a few spins. When I saw that Red had come up twice in a row, I put $20 on Black and won. I should have left then.
I watched a little more and watched a young couple put $10 on two different numbers and one of them paid off, 35:1. $350 and good for them. After a little longer, I put my $40 on Red because there had just been two Blacks. And doubled my money again. The waitress brought me a beer and I thought I was pretty smart. So I watched a while longer and saw two Reds in a row and put $40 on Black. There goes $40 as Red came up again. Three reds in a row.

This time it HAS to be Black. Another $20 on Black and it comes up Red again. So I am left with my original $20. I could walk away, having gotten two ‘free’ beers while wasting 45 minutes in the MGM at a table. But SURELY it will come up Black this time. And goodbye $20.
And with that I remembered the lesson I had learned in college. When I sit down at the table with my money and look around for the patsy, I don’t even need to bother. Because it is me.
When I got up to leave the dealer (spinner) said to me that the most times she had seen one color come up in a row was 17.
I was glad I got out of there when I did.

The luxurious massage

As promised, I bought the spa package for Wife. I admit, I did flinch a little bit when they told me how much it would cost. To be pampered at the MGM isn't cheap. And while I AM cheap, pamper the pregnant woman seems like a good strategy. She went off to spa, and I decided to take a nap. Sometime during my sleep, she crawls into bed. It is a little after 2pm. At 3pm we wake up and snuggle.
How was your spa? Did they rub your feet? Did they pamper you? I want really want to know if it was worth it.
She tells me that they rubbed her feet and really worked on her hips which have been aching quite a bit. She tells me that although she couldn’t sit in the hot tub, she wore her robe and dangled her legs in as far as she could. Not getting into the hot tub is hard on Wife, she misses taking long HOT soaking baths.
Then Wife looked at me and told me that the spa was women only and the steam room and hot tub were clothing optional. Wife said that while she wore her robe, a woman came in and tossed her robe and stepped into the hot tub, totally nekkid. Wife tells me that this nekked woman was tan all over, the dark dark brown tan like an antique walnut table, dark brown. The only light spots were the creases on her cheeks and the creases in her pits. And the Walnut brown woman had no hair down there. Wife had never seen that before. Totally smooth. And tan.
I asked Wife how her spa was and have to pull details about the massage from her. What Wife really remembers about her spa was Walnut brown woman and her bald cat. Well. I am glad I treated her to a totally luxurious spa package at the MGM resort. It was supposed to be memorable. I just didn’t expect it to be memorable because of the other guests.